Pain

I walk down this lonely road in a haze,

Yet I cross over it many times,

Just to feel the pain,

Just to feel it come to the surface,

And be real for everyone to see,

But why,

When I still hide it from everyone,

Why do I hide the tears,

Why do I hide the scars,

Why do I hide it at all,

I could end this pain forever,

With one dash down that lonely road,

But do I want that,

For the end to be here,

For there to be no more pain,

For everything to just be gone,

Lost to the darkness of death,

No,

I find comfort in the endless strides,

Across the lonely road,

Just scratching at the haze,

Picking at the pain in my heart,

The pain that makes me cry everyday,

Wishing for the end to be mine,

But honestly never wanting the pain to end,

Because that pain brought me you,

My love.

Be it What it Will

The sweet melody,

The sweet rhythm,

The sweet humming and drumming of the wind swim around me,

Dance around me,

Everything is right,

For once in my life everything is right,

Or so it seems,

And for that I am grateful,

Grateful whether it be truth or lie,

Right now it is,

And be it what it will.

The Truth Within

My heart aches from the lies,

Lies more to myself,

Rather than anyone else,

For years I've felt this pain,

Like a knife plunging deep within,

Rearing its ugly head when I pray,

Making everything seem wrong,

Wrong until I go somewhere and feel the breeze,

Or the sweet mist's lips against my cheek,

The earth's loving touch tickling my toes,

To release my spirit from these chains,

That lies within the fires of my heart.

Begging for Answers

The pain inside grows greater,

Then disappears,

Questions of doubt and fear swarm my mind,

What will the reaction be,

How will I say it,

What will I do,

Begging and pleading for answers,

For any release,

Release from this endless agony,

And the constant secrets.

Darkening Time

The darkness encases me,

Choking me,

Snuggling me into its arms,

Pain and sorrow test my spirit,

But all is never lost,

As time has flown,

Flown into a light of joy,

Joy within the darkness,

Darkness that had me in its grasps,

Leading me farther down,

Farther along,

And closer to my ending fate,

Alone and scared,

With only the darkening time.

Note: Originally posted on Tuesday May 27, 2014 on my former In and Out of Depression blog.

I Feel

I feel my life slipping from my grasps,

I feel the land leaving from beneath my feet,

I feel the broken hearts ache,

And I feel the pain of loss within my heart.

Note: Originally posted on Sunday November 25, 2012 on my former In and Out of Depression blog.

Hidden in Fear

The world seems dark and haunted I feel a cold chill upon my back. Fear surges through me and my muscles clench tight. I feel my eyes burning as the night grows upon us, speaking to me in hush words of dread. Spirits fly through the sky howling in the wind beneath the stars. Everything goes still in the pure silence. I feel the cool wind tickle my skin against the night air. A hand brushes against my shoulder yet I see nothing there. Is my mind playing tricks on me or am I going absolutely crazy. Then I see a glowing light at the end of a dark tunnel. This light grows brighter and brighter with every step I take nearer and nearer. Suddenly I'm stuck there in shock by the pureness of the pure blue crystal as everything seemed perfect. Then it went dark again but I did not fear. The shock of pain and suddenly lips met mine with a smiling kiss in the pure darkness of the world. This being then spoke in hush calmness. Speaking in truth together in happiness.

Note: Originally posted on Sunday September 30, 2012 on my former In and Out of Depression blog.

Lost in Depression

From bullets and knives to drowning in self intoxication,

Nothing seems to fit,

The pain worsens and you find yourself lost,

In everyone's sorrows,

Even in your own,

You guide them out as you plummet,

Deeper and deeper into the pit of lost souls,

Just waiting for the day,

For someone to take your hand,

So you can walk out together.

Note: Originally posted on Sunday September 30, 2012 on my former In and Out of Depression blog.

Wrapped in Safety

Day by day things change. You grow stronger then break down feeling hopeless in this huge world of misery. Then you feel like your flying as you get pulled back against the one person in the world that loves you for every little flaw. Your perfect to them. Your finally safe wrapped in his arms forever.

Note: Originally posted on Sunday September 30, 2012 on my former In and Out of Depression blog.

Roses

A simple fairy sits still,

Staring at the roses,

Pure and innocent to the eye,

But a hidden thorn in your side,

Plummeting deeper and deeper,

Tangled in Your heart,

Pain in beauty,

Yet all is right.

Note: Originally posted on Saturday September 29, 2012 on my former In and Out of Depression blog.

Cries of a Young School Girl

The peace and quiet world masking the truth trying to be heard. These woeful souls calling out in tainted blades of fresh blood from a young school girl. An empty bottle in the middle of the road, bleeding vomit, footsteps lead away, and a gun begins to fall from a hand at the hands of death. You look at the graves that surround you in the graveyard. But then with unsought thoughts you think what has happened to this world? Have the streets always been paved in handprints dipped in blood leading to the truth? A body of someone who died inside and now lies at our feet listening to cries the unheard cries for help from a young school girl.

Note: Originally posted on Friday September 28, 2012 on my former In and Out of Depression blog.

Take Me

You feel pain stabbing at your heart, crying for you to give in, for the endless darkness to take your hand, and rip your soul from your grasps. The voice softens and dreams fill your head. Crying for your pleading voice to be heard. Things scratched at your eyes causing you to bleed endlessly as your body falls weak and helpless. Your mind wondering is this the end, our great depart from reality in this dreaded world? Your heart is asking will my lips feel the kiss of death? Stealing every last breath you take till you feel nothing beneath your feet and the world's spirits from your body's presence as you die.

Note: Originally posted on Friday September 28, 2012 on my former In and Out of Depression blog.

Trust Me

The lights dim and my eyes fade to black, I hear nothing and feel everything. My heart races faster and faster till an illusion appears ahead of me. A voice speaks,"Come close and reach out your hand to touch me. I'll heal your pain and cure disease. Just reach out your hand and trust me."

Note: Originally posted on Friday September 28, 2012 on my former In and Out of Depression blog.

Heart in the Hands of Truth

Love found within truth,

And truths found within love,

Two hands holding together one heart,

With nothing in this world to break them apart.

Note: Originally posted on Friday September 28, 2012 on my formerly In and Out of Depression blog.

Trapped in Chains

Love trapped in chains,

Chains of fear and pain,

Trapped in love itself,

Along with never-ending pain.

Note: Originally posted on Friday September 28, 2012 on my former In and Out of Depression blog.